I don't really know what I'm doing by writing this.

All that I do know, is that I love to write.  Where will that take me?  Probably no where.  Does that bother me?  Yes, it very much so does.

My name is Mariah, leave it at that.  My middle name is Fawn.  My dad likes to hunt.  My brother's name was going to be Forrest.  Why does this matter?  It doesn't, but is there a point to a blog?

I think I came here on this fine evening because writing brings me happiness.  Something that I have been lacking for far, far too long.  The love of my life is on the other side of world.  I need him more then I can ever even imagine.  I'm dying.  No, I don't have cancer, aids, or whatever.  I don't know what I have.  I don't know what's killing me.  And Doctors?  They don't know either.

My ambien is the only pill I will take, besides the blood thinner pills that keep me alive.  But back to the ambien... just brings me to a lose of words.  It's taken me places that have cured me, made me live.  Every night begins a new adventure that I just hope I will remember.